Sunday, October 9, 2016

Story: Mr. Piddles and Hanuman



Mr. Piddles was left to himself for the day because Jonathon was at school. Mr. Piddles dreaded these days because they often lacked any form of adventure. A typical school day for Mr. Piddles looked like this:

7 AM: Wake up with Jonathon, help him get ready for school and pack his lunch
8 AM: Watch the squirrels and birds argue through Jonathon’s bedroom window
10 AM: Read all of the book titles on Jonathon’s bookshelf
11 AM: Eat some dust bunnies for lunch
2 PM: Try to talk to Jonathon’s other stuffed animals, particularly Ms. Pearl, a lovely black bear
3 PM: Watch for Jonathon’s school bus to come home

After Jonathon got home they would do a little bit of homework and then go explore. Today, however, Mr. Piddles had had enough. He would have his own adventure without Jonathon. So he picked himself up and walked out of Jonathon’s bedroom. He wasn’t sure what he would go do, but he knew that Sugriva was still in need of their help. Mr. Piddles slowly wandered out to the tree where they had previously met him. 

“Mr. Sugriva! Are you home?” Mr. Piddles yelled out to see if he could talk to Sugriva.
However, no one came out, so Mr. Piddles began to wander through the forest. Soon Mr. Piddles found another large monkey lying on the ground in the middle of all the trees. Who could this be?

“Hello?” Mr. Piddles began to poke the monkey, testing if he was still alive. 

“Oof, why hello there!” The monkey opened his eyes suddenly and sat upright.

“I’m Mr. Piddles who are you?” Mr. Piddles stretched out a paw to shake hands with the monkey.
“Hello, Mr. Piddles, my name is Hanuman! And I am looking for my friend Sugriva have you seen him? I used to work with him and I have a very important message for him.” The monkey started looking around the trees while Mr. Piddles talked. "A long time ago Sugriva and I fought together against a very evil demon king, Ravana. It was a very bad battle that caused a lot of damage. We had to leap ahead to the island the evil king was on and worked together to defeat him with another common friend, Rama. I am hoping to find my old friend Sugriva so that we may discuss some new developments from this war."

“Well, I haven’t seen Sugriva today, but I have met him here. Perhaps he is just out visiting another forest? I am sure he will return shortly?” Mr. Piddles wasn’t sure what these new developments were that Hanuman mentions, but they sounded dangerous. And he honestly wasn’t sure where Sugriva had run off to. 

“Oh, hmm, well, I will have to check back later to see if he is here. You said your name is Mr. Piddles?” Mr. Piddles nodded. “Well, it was very nice to meet you, Mr. Piddles. If you see Sugriva please tell him that I am looking for him! I will be here to nap until this evening; I do enjoy a nice warm afternoon nap in the forest.” Hanuman lay back down and closed his eyes. Mr. Piddles began his walk back to the house.

That was odd… I wonder what message Hanuman has for the monkey king?’ Mr. Piddles thought to himself as he entered the house. He would have to tell Jonathon about his adventure in their backyard once he got home. It was only 1 o’clock, so he still had plenty of time to catch up on his daily squirrel and bird adventures. 

Hanuman


Author's Note:


I really like the characters Sugriva and Hanuman so I was glad to incorporate them in my story again this week, although Sugriva wasn’t truly present in this story. I am trying to expand my universe with Mr. Piddles and Jonathon, so hopefully I will be able to use new characters from future weeks' stories with them.  I wanted Mr. Piddles to go on his own adventure this week because I liked the story from the Mahabharata that was told by a mongoose. Although Mr. Piddles is not a mongoose, he is the main animal character in my stories so I thought it would be fun to write from his perspective. It was fun trying to think of all the things a stuffed polar bear would do whilst waiting for his friend to return. I also wanted to utilize the fact that Hanuman was also included in both the Ramayana and the Mahabharata. I tried to use some parts of Hanuman's encounter with Bhima, how he was laying on the ground and how he introduced himself particularly. I also wanted to give some background as to who Hanuman is and how he and Sugriva know each other. Since these are the two main stories we have read so far I wanted to stick to familiar characters that would be easily recognizable to other readers.  I think that next week I will have the two meet and perhaps create a some adventures with all four of the characters!

6 comments:

  1. Hi Kaitlin! I liked how your story made me feel like a giddy child. Your characters have this feel to them that make me smile. It’s probably the fact that they exhibit a child-like personality, or maybe it’s just their names haha. I wonder why Sugriva needed Mr. Piddles help. Was it due to some crisis that was happening in Sugriva’s life? It would be helpful if you could expand on that so that the readers could better understand the reason as to why Mr. Piddles was looking for Sugriva. I also wonder why Hanuman needed to see him as well. Maybe in the end, Mr. Piddles and Hanuman become friends and therefore Mr. Piddles will no longer be so lonely. This would make me really happy. Overall, you did a great job on your story. Your choice of characters gave the story a calming and innocent feel to it. Keep up the good work!

    ReplyDelete
  2. There's something about Mr.Piddles and Jonathan that reminds me of both Pooh/Christopher and Spongebob/Patrick. Your story has a wonderful childlike energy around it, almost like children's theatre! It made me crack up when I read, "You said your name is Mr.Piddles?" It's so simple, it's gold. I wonder what type of relationship Hanuman will have together? Because, they must, right? I also think that you can extend this story, because like you said, it's only 1 o'clock- there's plenty of time for adventure!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hey! Your story was really unique and unlike anything I have read so far, it was really interesting. It had a childlike quality that just made me think of watching some cartoon but with a history aspect attached to it. I liked how you had one common character such as Mr. Piddles that was in the Ramayana so to speak, but it was weird how he did not know about Hanuman then. He was very important in that story. I did enjoy that you showed how he was sleeping in the middle of the Forrest just like in the Mahabharata with Bhima. When I was reading it that is the first thing I thought of, I realized though that your story was not about it later on.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh my gosh, once again this is absolutely adorable! I love Mr. Piddles and Jonathan! I really like how you were able to tie in Sugriva and Hanuman because they're pretty cool and I love their backstory. I kind of wish there was a little more action in it though. It's cute and sweet, but I wanted something more to happen to Mr. Piddles on his adventure! Still a great story though!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh my gosh, once again this is absolutely adorable! I love Mr. Piddles and Jonathan! I really like how you were able to tie in Sugriva and Hanuman because they're pretty cool and I love their backstory. I kind of wish there was a little more action in it though. It's cute and sweet, but I wanted something more to happen to Mr. Piddles on his adventure! Still a great story though!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I remember your first story you posted in your portfolio. I thought you did an amazing job on that one so I thought I'd continue Jonathan and Mr. Piddles' adventures. Writing wise, I personally didn't notice any huge gramatical errors that stuck out. The word choices and character descriptions you provided were really good. Your flow and transitions between scenes were really good and I especially like the point of view you wrote this story in. It contains so much innocence that I can totally see this being like a story for elementary kids to read to understand Indian epics.
    The idea you have behind this series is really cool. I remember being impressed by your first story and the concept was so new and unique. You did a really good job sticking with the original theme you wanted to convey. I can't wait to read more about their adventures.
    PS. "Mr. Piddles" is the cutest name ever!

    ReplyDelete